what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
We're too hungover to prance.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize