Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
