he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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