when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
