So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
