shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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