I love black thongs
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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