He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
