Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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