Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize
