It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
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kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
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You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.