Texts From Last Night

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  (443): View more from Maryland

  He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.

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  (443): He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep. http://tfl.nu/lshi
  Replies (27) Good night (1476) Bad night (4880)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card

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  (317): my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card http://tfl.nu/9m1o
  Replies (39) Good night (1372) Bad night (3740)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.

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  (678): What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick. http://tfl.nu/v9tv
  Replies (11) Good night (3948) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.

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  (323): Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl. http://tfl.nu/6wl6
  Replies (32) Good night (2151) Bad night (4204)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me

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  (612): Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me http://tfl.nu/r7ma
  Replies (17) Good night (934) Bad night (1993)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..

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  (843): Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming.. http://tfl.nu/kfd5
  Replies (49) Good night (2896) Bad night (5074)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.

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  (919): Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice. http://tfl.nu/je3x
  Replies (5) Good night (3010) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?

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  (203): Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high? http://tfl.nu/olxn
  Replies (8) Good night (785) Bad night (2247)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Just arrived at our party

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  (708): Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis (773): Just arrived at our party http://tfl.nu/7hao
  Replies (18) Good night (3735) Bad night (712)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious

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  (870): Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious http://tfl.nu/hhr4
  Replies (9) Good night (2087) Bad night (481)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...

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  (585): Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband... http://tfl.nu/78x2
  Replies (6) Good night (624) Bad night (1721)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?

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  (506): Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs? http://tfl.nu/qbtb
  Replies (9) Good night (864) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.

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  (714): I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle. http://tfl.nu/7gdx
  Replies (10) Good night (445) Bad night (951)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.

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  (952): So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child. http://tfl.nu/9pky
  Replies (0) Good night (754) Bad night (211)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.

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  (423): There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork. http://tfl.nu/8h9m
  Replies (3) Good night (805) Bad night (235)

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