he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
