So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
