They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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