it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
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