is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
