never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
