Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
