But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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