barbara walters just said penis...
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
