Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
