I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
