When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You took a bar mat shot.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
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