Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
