i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
It's rum buckets o'clock
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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