Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
