Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
