office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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