That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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