I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
