hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Randomize
