oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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