You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
