at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize
