i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
