It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
