You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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