Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
