My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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