Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
