Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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