I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
