I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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