Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
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