yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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