He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
