This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
