$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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