Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
