drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize
