he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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